5 Ways to Examine Influence and Choose What Aligns
“I did it because someone told me to”
It was said so casually. Lighthearted. Almost as a joke. It was a joke, but it was also true.
It stuck with me.
The decision she made may have been exactly right for her, but it made me wonder, how often do we allow the influence of others, full rein over our decision-making process? How often do we make decisions, not because we’ve fully thought them through or because we’ve checked in with ourselves, but because someone else suggested it and we didn’t give it a second thought.
It was someone we trust, someone who is confident, who always knows what they are doing and who seemingly has it all together. They lead and we follow.
In today’s world we are surrounded by influence. That influence comes from within our immediate circle, from what we scroll past, what we consume and what we observe others doing, achieving and recommending.
Advice, opinions, suggestions and direction are everywhere. When something is presented with confidence, or enough repetition, it starts to feel like something we should do. Before we know it, we find ourselves signing up, making the purchase or joining the club without ever stopping to ask if it truly aligns.
Influence can be beneficial. Positive influence can transform lives for the better when its foundation is built on trust and respect. Influence can introduce new opportunities, open doors, present new ideas and have a lasting impact.
Be influenced, but with awareness.
Over time, making decisions because someone influenced us, but not checking in with ourselves or pausing to make sure it aligns with our values, our goals or our intuition can disconnect us from our own voice.
Think about it:
It’s not about who told you
It’s about why you listened.
Was it alignment or was it easy?
Did you choose it, or did you just simply follow?
There is nothing wrong with saying yes to the suggestions or recommendations of others, but we must pay attention to our own voice before making any final decision. Pause long enough to ask yourself how you feel. Self-trust isn’t built by always knowing the answer, it’s built by including yourself in the decision-making process.
5 Ways to Examine Influence and Choose What Aligns
Pause before you act on influence.
Not every suggestion requires an immediate response. Give yourself time and space to think before making any commitments. This gives you time to respond with intention.
Notice why you are saying yes.
Are you saying yes because it feels right or because it feels easier to just go with the flow? The reason behind your yes matters as much as the answer itself.
Separate their confidence from your alignment.
Some people are decisive, assertive and certain. Confidence can be compelling and can influence you, but alignment is personal and belongs to you.
Allow influence to inform you, not decide for you.
Advice can guide you and being open-minded is a virtue. It can open your perspective, but it shouldn’t replace your voice or intuition. Allow it to be information, not instruction.
Remember that your path is your own.
What is working for someone else is right for them; that does not automatically make it right for you or right for you at this moment in time. Sometimes it’s not about whether something is good or bad, right or wrong, yes or no…it’s a matter of timing.
Influence is unavoidable. We don’t grow in isolation, we learn from each other, we’re often guided in meaningful ways by those around us, but the most important voice in any decision should be your own.